Dear Karen Kaye,

I am not sure if I am depressed, but I do not feel like doing much of anything for about the last year or so. What do I do?


Dear Dan,

Even if you do not know what to call it, the length of time that you have not been motivated is concerning. The longer you allow this despondency to persist, the more you get used to this sense of “blah,” as a style of life.

First of all Dan, I would recommend that you see your physician for your annual checkup to eliminate any physical cause for your apathy. In addition, be aware of your drug and/or alcohol intake as a determining factor. If you have any possible concern of abuse or addiction seek the help of a qualified counselor and/or call Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous.

If all the physical aspects check out all right, a qualified mental health counselor would be able to help you sort out your confusion; finding the cause of this difficult period.

Depression is anger gone inward. Most of the time, discovering the “right” questions are crucial at the beginning of a healing process. In sessions with my clients, I ask the following questions: “What is it you feel you need to be doing, that you are not doing?” “What is it you need to say to someone or yourself, that you are not saying?” Questions can unravel the mysteries not yet known. Sometimes, depression is an accumulation of little things that build up, Dan; and other times it is one big obvious event, that you are too close to realize.

The process of “finding out” the cause can be fun. It is like dropping a 100-piece puzzle on the floor, picking up each piece systematically, seeing what each piece reveals, and how they fit together. Before you know it, the picture is complete. Your apathy would turn to empathy for yourself. It’s a great New Year’s gift for you. Committing to you! Enjoy the journey.

Karen Kaye, LMHC